Learning through a good scare !


“A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice.”

Having lived in this world for more than 60 years, I find the above quote sums up very well the way young people prefer to learn. Instead of  …….. taking the good advices given them and  to act on the advices, the young people  prefer to do things their own way. More so if the advices were to come from their elders. More often than not, they  take the wrong turns and have to suffer painful consequences.  I have always find it hard to understand why it has to be this way but this  invariably is the result.

Advices from the elders are usually the instillation of lessons they have experienced throughout their lives. It is the essence gleaned from lessons provided by the ‘university of Hard-knocks’. But they are not taken as such by the youngsters, they prefer to go through the ‘hard-knocks’ themselves.

On the one hand, the elders want to shelter their children from having to go through the pains and sufferings they had gone through. On the other, the children insist of go through the ‘hard-knocks’  and experience the consequences themselves.

No matter how sound, how valid or how valuable these advices are, they are put aside for the sake of experience. Here lies the irony! Love, care and genuine concern are given out but they are rejected out of youthful eagerness to experience , out of the eagerness to grow and mature and out of the desire to self-discover things for themselves..

If a common ground can be reached, countless family conflicts and disruption can be avoided. There will be less love lost and there can be more peace and harmony in many families.

The truth is a common ground is achievable but, in most instances, temper outbursts, obstinacy, rigidity, the unwillingness to seek empathy and lack of readiness to compromise make reaching the common ground seems an unreachable task.

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