My answer would be a definite no if this was asked of me ten years or so ago. That was the time when all my children were still in primary school and I was the absolute czar in the family. I was so sure of my own abilities, I was pretty certain I would be able to handle any situation that might arise which might cause us to drift apart.
If the same question had been posed to me five years or so ago, my answer then would very likely be slightly modified. There would most likely be a qualification. It would sound something like – ‘Yes, maybe but there shouldn’t be anything that serious that it can’t be resolved as it is a family affair.’ A trace of uncertainty has crept in! This had come about because my position as czar of the family was no longer as solid as before. My faith in my own ability to hold sway in the affairs between my children and I had started to wavered. Deep inside me I still hold some hope that I still have some persuasive skill left.
If I am ask the question now, my answer would be a definite yes – “That’s for sure!”.! Reality leaves me no room to state otherwise. The fact is staring me straight in the face, I just have no other choice but to admit defeat. I have been dethroned as the czar. There are now so many chiefs in the family and each wants to stake his/her claim to the territory. (Remember the theme I used on the top of my blog before this and then see this one now, you will have the picture).) My say and opinions do not hold total sway anymore. Sometimes it looks like there is totally no sway at all.
How does this come about? Well, there are many causes, the main one being, when children grow up they want to exert their own independence. The age gap and the ‘lingo’ gap are the aggravating factors. The older generation wishes to save the younger generation the pains it had gone through but the younger generation feels this restricts its freedom and retards its growth.
What then should be the solution. The answer I have given myself is not to have too much and too high an expectation. I wish to learn not to cling to things, circumstances and people and be able to let go. It is a long and arduous journey but one I personally choose to embark upon.
May we all be happy, may we find the causes of happiness.